Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Things I recently learned

My folks just visited us for about a week and while they were here I learned a few things:

1. A 21-foot-diameter redwood isn't as impressive as it sounds, especially after a six-hour drive to get to it.

2. The best part about visiting national parks is getting your national parks passport book stamped.

3. Ukiah, California, is the center of the white trash universe. Who knew?

4. My dad loves getting breakfast at Denny's and starts talking about it two days before he is scheduled to go.

5. My mom loves it when the flight attendant gives you the whole can of pop. (Although, who doesn't love that?)

6. I hate oysters. I ate one for the first time while Marcy and my parents egged me on. I almost ralphed in their faces--that would have showed 'em!

7. I have become an expert at spotting the wild parrots of Telegraph Hill.

8. I am tired of small towns with quaint shops and restaurants.

9. Alcatraz is still cool after five visits.

10. My mom never outbids anyone in Rook, no matter how good her hand is.

11. I am also tired of hobos.

12 comments:

Melissa said...

You sure are right about Ukiah. I'm sad that you missed that rough woman standing at the gas pump yelling "FRITO!!!!!!" in the general direction of the gas station. And I'm sad that I missed when she went into the station and yelled at Frito for taking too long heating up his 18" burrito. At least we each saw part of the story.

Melissa said...

Thanks for not mentioning how I ate more than anyone and ordered the MEGA French Toast SLAM at Denny's and a platter at the seafood place that included 7 entrees.

Neil said...

In fairness, I ate half of your mega french toast slam, and part of your seafood platter, which you didn't even come close to finishing.

I'll never forget Frito. That kid was huge.

Carly said...

I'm sorry I talked up the Redwoods. When I saw them--and remember I drove something like 24 hours--I wanted to hug one and live inside it. But that's just me. I'm WAY more in touch with the environment. I will put Ukiah and Frito on my list of must-sees.

Neil said...

Carly--don't feel bad. It was my dad who wanted to go. And I'm glad I went. The redwoods are cool, for sure. I wish I could be as in touch with the environment as you are.

kacy faulconer said...

After 5 trips to Alcatraz you should have a whole pocketful of wall crumbs that you will have to find a way to distribute throughout the yard at exercise time. Me? I've never been, but I've seen the movie.

Erika said...

Neil you crack me up. I have not been to Ukiah now I know for sure I don't want to.

Emily said...

The funniness of you people kills me!

Anonymous said...

Be carefull with how many times you visit Alcatraz, haven't you seen the Psychic show where they conjure up long-dead, unruly spirits? One might take a liking to you and smuggle out with you.

Mike said...

Both times I've ventured into oyster territory I've come away feeling like I've just ingested warmed over snot. Perhaps they were just cooked wrong.

As for redwoods, shame on you. You of all people, Neal, should have trembled in awe at nature's majesty. You should have just gone to Muir Woods, just over the bridge in Marin.

Beka said...

I was just introduced to Marcy's blog and yours last night. I have spent far too much time reading them this morning. They are both totally engaging. But, I must break away. This is beginning to border on neglect of my children.

By the way, I'm glad you got to visit Ukiah. All of my extended family live there. My family has had a strong presence in Ukiah since the goldrush. I feel proud to say we've made the town what it is today.

Neil said...

Welcome, Rebeka. You've increased my blog audience by like 30%.

I don't suppose you have a cousin named Frito?